Halo Halong Pinoy

Friday, November 12, 2010

JOKETIME : Legal Jokes

Judge: When was the first time you dropped out of class because of amnesia or memory problem.

Witness: I don't recall sir. I can't remember.



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Fiscal: Could you see him from where you were standing?

Witness: I could see his head.

Fiscal: And where was his head?

Witness: Just above his shoulders.

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Q. Those who don’t have me, don’t wish for me. Those have me do no wish to lose me. Those who win have me no longer. What am I?

A. L a w s u i t

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Accused: But Judge I did it for you.

Judge: What! You did it for me?

Accused: Oh yes, Judge. The last time I was in trouble I promised you that I would never get arrested again – and I was just trying to keep my promise.

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Judge: You have been appearing before me in this Court for seven years.

Accused: Excuse me You Honor, but is it my fault if you are not getting promoted?

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Prosecutor: Where was the police officer in relation to you when you were struck by the car?

Witness: To my left sir.

Prosecutor: How far to your left?

Witness: I don’t really remember, I was getting run over at that time.

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